As I was preparing myself to participate in the 31-Day Challenge over at Problogger, I did a personal audit, not of the content of my blog, but of my marketing and networking (which are much newer skills for me).
I realized that many of us fall into the trap of netfaking; performing networking-esque activities that serve little real purpose, but make us think we’re marketing ourselves. Actions which are the easy (but mostly useless) way to feel good about our networking.
Many successful book and product releases in the recent future can be linked back to powerful network building (The 4-Hour Workweek by Tim Ferriss comes to mind, as does the very recent I Will Teach You To Be Rich by Ramit Sethi). By earning the trust of a large group of targeted individuals (one at a time, usually) you put yourself in a powerful position; when you release product, the people most likely to talk about it (spreading your business) will see it first.
But are you really building a network?
I realized that I don’t do nearly as much as I think I do, with respect to marketing and networking. Consider the following overrated actions (many of which are highly recommended by blogging experts):
- Submitting your posts to social network sites.
Alone, this does very little; yes you may get a click or three from when your post first appears on Digg or StumbleUpon, but unless your content is extremely viral (often inversely proportional to useful), the broad social networks are less than stellar networking tools.
- Submitting your posts to blog carnivals.
These are slightly better, since the content (and thus readers) are usually focused on a particular topic (hopefully your topic). However, many blog carnivals today are all-topics, all-accepted; a recipe for a 300-link post that nobody will ever want to read through.
- Tweeting your blog posts.
Announcing your blog posts on Twitter has a few downsides; the speed of Twitter means that your “notification” is only going to be seen by people for a few minutes; often your followers will feel like these types of posts are spam (one person I follow fills my screen with batches of 6-10 posts at at time; I’m strongly considering un-following them); and tinyurl links don’t exactly inspire action or clicking.
- Commenting on other blogs.
Yes, commenting is important; leaving “great post!” is not. Further, on the most popular blogs, people rarely read beyond the first few comments, so if you’re comment number 73, you might be wasting your time.
- Sharing blogroll links.
Please hear me out as I tread further into blogging sacrilege territory. Again, the problem is devaluation; when you are a member of a 400 link blogroll, the SEO benefits don’t change, but the real benefits (read; people finding your blog) do. A blind trade of links (which are likely to be buried in a sidebar somewhere) doesn’t do as much as you might think for increasing meaningful connections.
So what should we do about this? How can you and I turn our netfaking into networking? First a few general principles, then we’ll apply them to the above “weak” marketing techniques.
Add value.
Yes, the phrase “add value” has become something of a buzzword in the Web 2.0 world, but this is one concept that rings true. People like when you’re generous. People like when you give them things/information. Social dynamics are predicated upon this; people want to be associated with and work with people of high value. Consequently, the more value you add in interactions (offline or online), the better.
Maintain a conversation.
Many social interactions are too short to demonstrate or transfer value. “Digging” a post doesn’t provide much useful feedback to a writer; spamming an unrelated link in a blog’s comment box and never returning provide no value to anyone; posting your breakfast on Twitter doesn’t help anyone.
The onus is on you to maintain and cultivate a conversation with people. If a blogger posts an interesting article; don’t just make a comment; ask questions, provide evidence, link to a similar article your wrote (or one that argues the point). But don’t stop there! Continue the discussion with other commenters, talk to the writer off-blog. If a study comes out supporting their point a few weeks down the road, send it to them.
Real conversations like this, in which value is shared over time, lead to mutual respect and trust, and thus lasting relationships that you can add to your network.
Networking is work; it takes time.
This relates closely to the above tenet, but it bears repeating. When I first started blogging, I allocated 1 hour a week for networking! Absurd. I used that hour (often less) to send off my posts to the various social networking sites and blog carnivals. Maybe I’d make a post or two on a forum.
That just doesn’t cut it. People underestimate the work that goes into social networking, and the also fail to plan to do it. As in so many other fields, automation helps here. Blocking off one hour per day to network, with specific networking tasks (we’ll get to those soon) would be more realistic. Once it becomes a routine, things will get easier (I recall struggling to think of things to do during “networking time”).
Currently, I spend about 30 minutes a day just reading other fashion and marketing blogs, and commenting on the ones I can contribute value to. I feel that this is still woefully insufficient, but I’m making progress.
Now, let’s revisit those netfaking tasks and see how we can turn them into networking (these are thinks I personally want to start doing better, so I’m in the same boat as many of you):
- Targeted Social Networks
Most of the major social networking sites (Digg, Facebook, StumbleUpon, Delicious, etc.) have tools in place that let you identify and link with “friends” or other people with similar interests. Whenever possible, you want to target who you send information to, as this makes it more likely that you’ll also be providing value. The average Digg user does not care about your post on the latest fighter jet propulsion system. There is a group of a few hundred users who really care. Find them and talk to them.
- Be picky with blog carnivals.
This largely follows the same vein as my advice for social networks; don’t concern yourself with unfocused, uninterested carnivals and users. Find carnivals that are hosted by people who care about the topic, receive contributions that are always on-topic, and promote to a devoted readership. If there aren’t any out there, build one yourself. Also, don’t be afraid to “cut” articles. This isn’t Pee-Wee Football; if you only let the best through, your carnival will gain trust among the readers, and the contributors will compete harder against themselves to get in. Win-win-win.
- Tweet with a purpose.
I do not recommend tweeting all of your blog posts. In fact, you should tweet very few of them, and those that you do tweet should not go out en masse. Instead, be patient. Wait until someone has a question, or posts a similar tweet; then add value with your work and start to build a conversation. If other people want to join in, great, but don’t assume everyone is interested from the start. (This means @replies and direct messages are your friend. If somethings useful, it will get retweeted and spread.)
- Comment and question.
Whenever you comment on another blog, use the opportunity to extend a conversation (the conversation started by the blog post you just read). Statements aren’t good conversation maintainers. Neither are cursory notions of applause or criticism.
Questions, on the other hand, are great ways to get another response. Questions (when addressed to the group) are also great for drawing people into a conversation, which allows new threads of discussion to develop. This makes the job of maintaining a conversation easier; as old threads are resolved, you can move on to new ones to keep the talking alive.
I don’t mean to say you should only ask questions; it’s hard to add value when you’re speaking entirely in interrogatives. But do follow up your insights with points of further discussion, Jeopardy style (that is, in the form of a question).
- Link as an afterthought.
Blog linking, social networking, “friending,” putting someone on your Christmas card list; these are all silly formal ways to make it appear as if you have connections. Having 800 Facebook friends puts up a nice facade (which does have its merits), but doesn’t compare to having 100 real friends that love talking to you.
In a lot of the best relationships, friendship and connection is built before one of these “official” barriers is met, and this is a good goal to aim for. It’s an interesting phenomenon when a friend you’ve gotten close with suddenly realizes “we’re not Facebook friends.” At that point, it doesn’t seem to matter very much, does it? Yeah, you’ll probably do it as soon as you get home, but it doesn’t really add anything to the friendship, does it?
Of course not. It doesn’t add anything when you’re not good friends either.
Thus, aim to build a real connection between bloggers before you even think about exchanging links. After several fruitful conversations about the intricacies of your topic, one of you will realize the lack of linkage and fix it. At that point, as an afterthought really, the link really means something.
Consider how hard you’re working on building a network as you continue to build your blog, the two often go hand-in-hand, even though some of us neglect to treat things that way.
Are you networking or netfaking?
-Barry
Tags: 31 day challenge, advice, blogging, marketing, netfaking, networking, problogger, social network, social networking, tips
28 comments
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4.8.09 at 4:17 pm
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4.8.09 at 6:10 am
Zen Life
Really enjoyed your post. It was something percolating in my mind but you actually wrote it down: the deeper purpose of spending time in virtual life.
Is there one? Are we only hunting for links and ads revenue?
Is that all?
Netfaking as you call it is a dangerous path because it is so difficult to differentiate from real virtual socializing.
Regards Michael
4.8.09 at 6:55 am
Deb
I agree that maintaining a conversation is very important!
I do think the new blogger needs to try everything, and then find out what works for them. I use twitter because I like the speed, the information and the people I follow. I am not over there chatting – I’m sharing information, hearing what people say and writing about it. Not everyone uses twitter that way though. To each his own.
I use facebook more like a meeting point for a group of my friends. They do share my blog posts – and that is helpful.
So yeah – I’ve netfaked. I’m also networking!
@debworks
4.8.09 at 8:53 am
Garreth Wilcock
A really thought provoking article. I was drawn by the net-faking title, as a coach recently talked about net-working rather than net-eating or net-drinking.
One thing that sends a red flag to me is the folks who tweet every blog post and little else. Another is actually on the 31 days to a better blog course.
When I sign up, the lead capture system essentially tells me that my domain blocks their email traffic. Which is like saying “people think we spam a lot”.
I wondered if this is a red flag to anyone else?
4.8.09 at 9:46 am
Fabulously Broke
This could not have come at a better time. I was netfaking before, but just recently, I’ve started taking a more critical look at my blog to figure out what it needs.
I do the posts on Twitter, but only the relevant ones (I don’t tweet everything I write, if I did, I’d take myself off Twitter).
I think the same rings true with blog carnivals as it does with your point about people only reading the couple of comments. I don’t read every comment on every blog post (if I did, I’d need another 24 hours to live each day), and with blog carnivals, I skim through the editor’s picks, or until an interesting post catches my eye, and that’s normally with wording.
Great points. Will bookmark the article and remind myself about what not to do.
4.8.09 at 10:25 am
Joel
I got here from the 31DBB post for today. I’ve been tweeting my posts as well as promoting them on Facebook, but I feel like you may have hit the nail on the head in that while I am involving myself in conversations with other writers/bloggers/people of like interest, I’m not using those conversations to build traffic.
I’ve been sort of separating my time between actively networking (for it’s own sake) and using those networks to promote my blog and site. Really useful suggestion, that I’m going to try to focus on better.
Thanks.
4.8.09 at 10:39 am
Simon
Nice article,
One small suggestion which you may not have though about or didn’t know about to help promote you blog – you need to change your “permalinks” setting in WordPress
From an SEO point of view your current URL for this article –
http://www.3stylelife.com/?p=791
isn’t not as search friendly as this one -
http://www.3stylelife.com/are-you-networking-or-netfaking
Just a thought!
Simon
4.8.09 at 10:52 am
@Tamikka
Hi Barry,
Your comments, both from today and yesterday, have caught my eye. I appreciate the input that you share in the comments in the #31DBBB posts. Hence, I “trust” you to enough to check out your blog.
I’ve linked a post to a tweet in the past and got a great response. This automatically updates my FB status. This is where I am hesitating. Even though I don’t “hide” my blog from anyone, I appreciate the fact that my circle on Facebook, 98% of whom I know personally, has to look go “find” my blog. I don’t have this issue with Twitter as the majority of the people that follow me don’t have a personal relationship with me.
I enjoying commenting on blogs that I find interesting and look to see if they have a twitter account. Twitter has led to more blogs than anywhere else. I hope that more bloggers will use the medium in the future.
Looking forward to your additional comments.
4.8.09 at 11:00 am
Barry
Thanks for stopping by everyone!
Deb – I agree, we all have to find out what works for us, the reason I wrote this article is because the behaviors I mention are what many people do by default, and think that it’s “the way to do things.” I just want to make them rethink things a bit.
Garreth – Yeah, I try to be selective with services where I have an invested connection (twitter, facebook), and will only post things that either help someone directly or if I think it’s particularly useful. With broader sites (digg, stumbleupon) you can submit everything, since it doesn’t directly go to someone’s attention queue.
Fabulously Broke – The blog carnivals have especially spiraled out of control. I know of several now which post over 100 articles DAILY. That’s useless, and might as well be spam. Glad you enjoyed the points.
Simon – Thank you for the tip! I had wondered where to change that setting, and now I know. Especially with the advent of URL shorteners, there is really no advantage to the numbered-post URL. Thanks a lot!
-Barry
4.8.09 at 11:07 am
Barry
@Tamikka – Thanks for the permission! I agree with Facebook, it should be made available, but not put in everyone’s face. You are not the same as your blog!
Simon – I just tried switching it, but it killed access to all my old post (seems like it would break links all over the web). Does anyone know how to change it without catastrophe?
-Barry
4.8.09 at 11:17 am
Simon
Not sure – one option off the top of my head would be to go to the “edit” page for each post (all new posts – best leave old ones now) and you can edit the permalink towards the top of the “edit” page.
Simon
4.8.09 at 1:05 pm
A-ron
Now that you point this out, I guess I’ve been “netfaking” all along. The social media sites are the lazy man’s way of networking. It doesn’t take much effort and you don’t really have to “put yourself out there” because of the still anonymity of it all; you can purport to be anything you want.
I think a question that may be missing is who’s really paying attention? I think you’re dead on when you say you should target just a handful of people to read your articles. Direct messages are probably more effective than just lazily blasting everything you do out to the world and hoping someone pays attention. It’s been my experience that people want to be heard yet don’t want to listen. I’m definitely going to refocus my efforts.
If you’re interested, I wrote a small article on expanding technology and disconnection…
http://blog.codevigilante.com/uncategorized/the-technology-curve-and-disconnection/
4.8.09 at 3:21 pm
Charlie
Followed your comment from Darren’s 31DBBB to your own site. And kept taking notes right on through. Your observations reveal some of the construct of the social network world. Much like the PotPieGirl, you demystify things others take for granted and use. You helped me with: *why one should maintain conversation. *the tools available at social networking sites *NOT tweeting everything and building valuable conversation as well. And like PPG you said it takes time and work, thanks for those assertions–otherwise I would just think I am stupid.
(do I have to say I am new at this?)
Charlie
4.8.09 at 3:31 pm
Michael Grills
What a great post. And so true.
Its hard to wade through the crowd on the net. But you need to keep posting and shouting to get to those more meaningful relationships. Once you get there keep working on them.
4.8.09 at 4:53 pm
Barry
Wow, look at all these comments!
Joel – Glad I could provide some insight. I imagine professional bloggers (or professional hopefuls) have dedicated blocks of time to legitimate networking.
A-ron – The attention question is a good one. People do like to be heard, so often it helps to hear before you speak. Comment on someone else’s work before you show them your own. Talk to someone (and help them) about their work before you advertise your own.
Charlie – Glad you found the information useful. Everything we do is about a conversation, at some level, whether it be about a product, an idea, or a service. One-sided (like TV advertising) is a thing of the past. Don’t worry, we’re all new sometime (myself included, still, I’ve only been at it 9 months). Blogging is not a path to instant success!
Michael – Absolutely. It’s all about starting and then maintaining relationships. That is the essence of marketing, really.
-Barry
4.9.09 at 7:16 am
Trisha
I feel like someone has finally addressed the issue of social media marketing.
Two points that have really stuck with me are that it takes much more time than most realize. Your guidelines on setting strategic goals sets the stage for getting a handle on this huge social media world. It’s all about building relationships, and that takes time whether it’s online or offline.
I also agree that listening is the best tool to connect with others who are in your niche. Don’t you find that you ignore those tweets that are “in your face” pitches? They are as annoying as commercials. I know those people are doing the best they can – they are following a system that tells them the wrong way to promote their business. A very few people will follow their links.
4.9.09 at 1:08 pm
Tricia Chaves
Your comment about the list post and the #31DBBB not dictating your blog really resonated with me, and I checked out your blog where I read this article. I feel like I’ve been “netfaking” to a point that it’s distracting me from my content! Thanks for perspective & tips for making the social “networking” more effective!
4.9.09 at 8:02 pm
Ralph
I have been beating myself up because I don’t get how to actually connect on Twitter. I have loads of followers – I just have no idea why because they have no interest in my Tweets and don’t respond to my replies.
You do provide more depth as a follow the 31Day plan.
I don’t so much see myself as netfaking as much as mindlessly following the herd with no insight about where I am going. You have helped me with that but the horizon is still shrouded in fog.
Since you offered, I would appreciate your taking a look at this post and comment. I think I may be blogfaking instead of providing value.
http://ralphcarlsonblog.com/wordpress/2009/03/private-philanthropy-an-american-tradition/
Thanks for your contribution to the course.
4.10.09 at 6:15 pm
Monique Nelson
Your article is great and incredibly thought-provoking. My dilemma (and I don’t think I’m alone) is that I only have TIME to net-fake. If you had to choose one area to stop faking and start working, which would that be? I am gearing myself up to become a better networker, but I am getting psyched out because just creating the pieces I need to promote take more time than I have! I sincerely appreciate your advice, however, and I look forward to more! @MoniqueNelson
4.11.09 at 2:08 pm
Lisis | Quest For Balance
Hey, I suddenly realized, “we’re not Facebook friends!” No worries… I can fix that right now…
;-)
4.12.09 at 12:35 pm
Sheryl Loch
Hello Barry,
I think you have done a wonderful job of pointing out the difference between NetWorking and NetFaking.
I am also glad to see that I am not the only one that can write a long post.
I believe that many people fall into the trap of trying to be someone they are not while ‘networking’. You read their post and think you have an idea of who they are but, if you watch them long enough (or actually talk to them) they are a totally different person.
They have read how someone else tells them to write, ‘make sales’, ‘use a tool’ and they are just coping that person hoping to get results. They forget that they are a person unlike anyone else and should use that to attract the right people. Only problem is, some people may not like the real you (oh no!).
All of this just to say that what works for 1 person may not work for you. It takes time to build trust and find other like minded people.
4.12.09 at 1:46 pm
The Word Seeker
I just wanted to say that you make some excellent points. I always thought that twitter and other social bookmarks help your traffic, however recently come to notice that it does not. But marketing to me is not easy and everyday I try to learn about it.
Great Blog and post.
4.13.09 at 4:50 am
Jean
Hi Barry
Very interesting and thoughtful post . Love your concept of “netfaking” .. something I am experiencing in the real world of networking .. and so am going to have to leave the group after a long time.
I am just launching my blog (Day 5 of Darren’s 31 Day Challenge!) .. so have not tried promoting yet yet .. so it is all good fuel for thought.
I also appreciated the fact that you are interested in fahsion and have it on the same blog
4.13.09 at 8:55 am
Solomon
Hi Barry,
True that our comments which initiate a conversation gives lot of impact to the writer and as well as the reader; this factor I found in your comments in the Darren’s 31 day program.
Your post is really so well-written, it took me by my collar. I don’t know how fast I finished till the last. I really admire and appreciate your genuine interest to give something (add value) to your reader. I really liked your attitude to contribute even through comments in other without overly selling yourself (which is very important).
I hate comments without revealing a bit of view on that. or what I feel about it. It’s sheer waste of time.
I liked here what sheryl is saying and several of them. I think your readers are all of birds of same feather. me too included!
I blog on copywriitng, branding and life. I’m a sort of tech-challenged sustaining on the generous help from friends who guided me till here. I have so much to give through my posts about my experiences…but this tech thing is coming my way huh…sigh..!
Solomon
4.15.09 at 10:20 am
Meghan Newton
Hi Barry,
I’ve also been fascinated by how 4HWW and the like have built such strong networks. I’m fairly new to blogging, but I already share your feelings about networking v.s. netfaking. I just don’t feel that doing those highly recommended ‘overrated actions’ that you mentioned above have much value. It seems that I do more netfaking than networking, just because I make very little time for it.
You mentioned that 30 minutes or an hour is not enough time to network. In a perfect world, how much time would you devote to networking per week, and on which activities would you spend the most time?
Thanks,
Meghan
4.30.09 at 10:46 am
Prince Sioni
Great post barry!
You have opened my eyes wider.